Things That Make Me Want To Flop

When I was younger ( I wish I could say much younger...) When I didn't particularly like something or something happened that I didn't want to happen, I would flop on the ground like a dead fish. Literally. ( I can't seem to write this without laughing about the absurdity of it now though hahaha) I realize that falling on the ground doesn't help anything but it sure seemed a reasonable reaction to me at the time...

Here in Brazil there are many, many things that are impossible to understand or for me to fully explain to someone who has never lived here. Even so, I am going to try. So without further ado, here are some things that make me want to flop.

Massive lines. The people here have an amazing tolerance level. ( As shown by the recent protests, which should have happened long ago) When I say lines, I don't mean like the line you wait in at McDonald's to get a Big Mac and some fries. Imagine the time you wait at a local In-N-Out burger and multiply it by 5. It's absurd. It doesn't matter where you are; the bank, the bus station, the hospital etc. You have to go prepared to first wait in line to get a number and THEN wait for your number to be called. Flop.

Superstitions. Myths. Urban legends. Call them what you want, but almost everyone believes them here. Pretty frustrating to explain to someone that something they have been taught their whole life is made up. For example: sitting on a hot surface causes hemorrhoids. Don't try arguing with a Brazilian about this one. Putting on clothes while they are hot is bad for you. (Not sure why). If you don't eat beans you will get sick. This one just makes me laugh. :) There are others but you get the picture. Flop.

Jeitinho Brasileiro.  Otherwise known as flakiness. My mother would not approve. Nothing happens on time. No one is all that worried about arriving when they say they will or starting a meeting at the right time. Drives me crazy. The "jeitinho" is not just flakiness though. If you clicked the link you found out that it can be whatever you need it to be. Whatever you say about Brazilians, they get things done. Although many times it's not the "ethical" way. This is reflected in their politics as nearly every politician is extremely corrupt and very self-serving. Flop.

Organization. Physical and mental. This one is kind of ironic. I enjoy having things organized but I myself am not particularly organized. (Ask my parents about my high school graduation) Very few people here seem to know how to (or care to know) organize well. Many streets are full of trash because the city was made without planning. (I would think this could be fixed relatively easily but I'm not sure why it hasn't been.) People are always running around at the last minute trying to get things done. (yes, I fit in very well here) Still,  this one deserves a mini-flop.

This may have seemed like a whine-fest, but I had to get it out of me. Next time, I'll write about all of the awesome things Brazil and its people have to offer!



Honorable Mention: No hot water (for the majority of the population), the justice system, wax napkins, toilets that don't flush toilet paper, no salt and pepper at the dinner table, cars with sound systems so loud your heart shakes, Brazilian soap operas, and last but definitely not least, public transportation.